These violent fits of despair or revolt because of trivial difficulties like this are not the right way of meeting them (difficult situations). Mother had not the slightest intention of hurting you or keeping you aloof from her. Why can you not have more confidence and credit her with a reasonable mind and kind intentions even if for the moment you fail to see her purpose in an action? This was a perfectly reasonable arrangement—if you did not want it, you had only to tell her so. Recover yourself and get back into the true attitude in which you can see things simply and naturally; do not allow yourself to be flung off the track by suggestions of the old kind.
The only sure basis on which you can go is a quiet mind and confidence in yourself and the Mother.
Ref: The Mother with Letters on The Mother